Rose Sweet
Rose Sweet

The Church teaches that a valid, sacramental marriage bond can only be broken by death.
Why? Because a valid marriage mirrors and has been “caught up into” and become part of the unbreakable marriage bond between Christ with His Bride (all of us in His church). He never breaks his covenant with us. He never leaves us. No divorce. Ever.
However, for some people there was a wedding, with hopes and dreams, but something prevented a true marriage bond from forming.
What is an annulment?
The formal term is “Decree of Nullity’ and ‘annulment’ has become the common phrase. It’s not to be confused with a civil annulment. Very briefly,
- It says something prevented a true marriage bond from the very beginning,
- Either a lack of capcity, or full consent, or of proper form,
- But it doesn’t deny the love, affection, family ties and other goods between you and your ex spouse.
- It acknowledges the civil marrage as valid,
- And any children born of the union are not consisdered illegitimate.
There was a wedding but was there a true bond?
Everyone assumes that the couple at the altar has been properly prepared for marriage and knows exactly what they are doing. We trust that each has the full capacity to enter into marriage as the Church understands it. And the Church presumes when they exchange consent (say I do) that a valid marriage bond comes into being at that moment. The Church will defend and uphold that bond until one spouse dies. But sometimes there is something in the mind, heart or background of one or both of the spouses that impedes their consent. If so, a valid bond is not created. Maybe people knew, or had a hint, or had no idea at all. Regardless, what looked like a marriage was–sadly–only a wedding.
Some marriages may be missing an essential element
Jesus says (Matt 19) some people just aren’t capable of entering into a valid marriage union. Like some people can’t drive a car even though their feet reach the pedals and they really want to drive. And the church recognizes—with the same love of justice and desire for mercy as Jesus—that imperfect people enter into what are called “attempted marriages”. Despite good intent, something serious may have been obstructive or missing that prevented the union from ever being able to rise to the level of a true marriage.
Both right intent and capacity are necessary for the bond
Examples? Maybe one never intended to be completely faithful, or due to a deep psychological wound lacked the capacity for fidelity. In today’s cultural climate, it may not be unusual for one or both to believe that divorce—while not desired—could be a logical and reasonable option. That is a defective “consent” to marriage.
- Some have withheld important information from the the other (prior children, numerous abortions, or more),
- Others may be completely against ever having children,
- Maybe one spouse was married before and not free to marry again,
- Or one was grossly immature, under-age, under grave fear or pressure to marry (shotgun weddings),
- Some are severely addicted and not capable of living up to their vows,
- Others may be caught in a lifetimne strugle of same-sex attraction.
All of these are areas that do not reflect the free, total, faithful, fruitful love of the Bridegroom for His Bride and therefore can impede a valid marriage bond from being formed on the wedding day.
The reasons for nullity are complex
This is a complex issue because marriage is a serious issue. Most Catholics—including some clergy—haven’t been suffciently educated on the truth about marriage, much less about annulments, but we hope to help remedy that through our work and materials.
More helpful information on annulments:
Was there a true marital bond?
References
Bible: Whatsoever you bind on earth shall be bound in heaven; and what you loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Matt 16: 18- 20
Catechism: . . . the Church, after an examination of the situation by the competent ecclesiastical tribunal, can declare the nullity of a marriage. CCC 1629
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