{"id":6833,"date":"2020-01-21T12:02:19","date_gmt":"2020-01-21T12:02:19","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/rosesweet.com\/?p=6833"},"modified":"2022-07-16T01:12:48","modified_gmt":"2022-07-16T01:12:48","slug":"short-list-to-loving-your-wife","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/rosesweet.com\/short-list-to-loving-your-wife\/","title":{"rendered":"Short List to Loving Your Wife"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"fusion-fullwidth fullwidth-box fusion-builder-row-1 fusion-flex-container nonhundred-percent-fullwidth non-hundred-percent-height-scrolling\" style=\"--awb-border-radius-top-left:0px;--awb-border-radius-top-right:0px;--awb-border-radius-bottom-right:0px;--awb-border-radius-bottom-left:0px;--awb-flex-wrap:wrap;\" ><div class=\"fusion-builder-row fusion-row fusion-flex-align-items-flex-start fusion-flex-content-wrap\" style=\"max-width:1248px;margin-left: calc(-4% \/ 2 );margin-right: calc(-4% \/ 2 );\"><div class=\"fusion-layout-column fusion_builder_column fusion-builder-column-0 fusion_builder_column_1_1 1_1 fusion-flex-column\" style=\"--awb-bg-size:cover;--awb-width-large:100%;--awb-margin-top-large:0px;--awb-spacing-right-large:1.92%;--awb-margin-bottom-large:0px;--awb-spacing-left-large:1.92%;--awb-width-medium:100%;--awb-spacing-right-medium:1.92%;--awb-spacing-left-medium:1.92%;--awb-width-small:100%;--awb-spacing-right-small:1.92%;--awb-spacing-left-small:1.92%;\"><div class=\"fusion-column-wrapper fusion-flex-justify-content-flex-start fusion-content-layout-column\"><div class=\"fusion-text fusion-text-1\"><p>What does any wife <em>really<\/em> want?\u00a0 Whether she can voice it fully, or even admit it, her desire is:<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\"><em>To be loved by her husband like Jesus loves his Bride<\/em><\/p>\n<h5><strong>Wives know fake love when they see it<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>When my husband is in a good mood, he\u2019ll often tell me, \u201cHoney, I just want YOU to be happy.\u201d\u00a0 I usually roll my eyes, laugh, and say, \u201cOkay, prove it!\u201d\u00a0 Then his eyes will get big, he\u2019ll rush over to kiss me . . . \u00a0and I\u2019ll hand him the broom and dustpan.\u00a0 I think we grew up watching too many sit-com marriages.<\/p>\n<p>The reality is that everyone knows true love when they receive it\u2014and they know the counterfeit. Wives don\u2019t always trust their husbands when the gestures of love are measured, performed out of resentful &#8220;duty&#8221;, put off for a more convenient time, or have conditions placed on them.\u00a0 Their lack of trust is well-founded; <em>those kinds of acts are not love<\/em>.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Husbands DO just want their wives to be happy!<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Ladies, the men we married do love us, and most are happy when it comes written down and a shortlist.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: center;\">\u201cJust tell me what you WANT, honey, and I\u2019ll do it!\u201d<br \/>\n\u201cI can\u2019t read your mind, woman . . . what is it you want?\u201d<\/p>\n<p>A happy marriage sets the tone for the whole household.\u00a0 And it begins with how Dad loves Mom. But past the tire changes or taking out the trash, wives want real love.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Jesus gives us the list<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>So what does real love look like? In St. John Paul II\u2019s powerful work, <em>Love and Responsibility,<\/em> and his \u201cTheology of the Body\u201d, we are given the shortlist. Both are studies in the specifics of how God loves his people, how Christ loves his Bride. Both draw from Scripture\u2019s &#8220;spousal analogy.&#8221;<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>In the Old Testament \u2013 God\u2019s \u201cBride\u201d is Israel<\/li>\n<li>In the New Testament \u2013 Jesus\u2019 \u201cBride\u201d is the Church (us)<\/li>\n<li>In Revelation \u2014 Heaven is the eternal Wedding Feast<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Earthly marriage stems from, points to, and should be caught up into the beauty of the eternal heavenly marriage. Knowing how to love rightly is the way we begin to taste a little of that heaven right here on earth.\u00a0 Following the Lord,<em> this is how husbands are to love their wives<\/em>:<\/p>\n<h5 style=\"text-align: left;\"><strong>Jesus\u2019 love for his Bride is FREE<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">\u201cNo one takes it from me, but I lay [my life] down on my own.\u201d [<a href=\"http:\/\/www.usccb.org\/nab\/bible\/john\/john10.htm\">John 10:18<\/a>]\nWhen a husband is operating out of fear of not getting his way, or bound up with resentment that he has to suffer, or is trapped in selfish habits of laziness, lust, or more, he is NOT FREE.\u00a0 If he chooses marriage or stays married because he is afraid of being alone, hard work, financial loss, or not having sex, then he is not truly FREE. He can use his wife and marriage as a social cover or security blanket. He cannot love his spouse or anyone when he is thus bound. And wives know it.<\/p>\n<h5 style=\"text-align: left;\"><strong>Jesus\u2019 love for his Bride is FULL<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\"><em>This is my body, which will be given for you<\/em>. [<a href=\"http:\/\/www.usccb.org\/nab\/bible\/luke\/luke22.htm\">Luke 22:19<\/a>]\nMeasured \u201clove\u201d isn\u2019t love. I&#8217;ve come to resist the word &#8220;compromise&#8221; because it is still calculated. It has its place in some areas but, in relationships, it can be a stubborn grasp on what one thinks they need or deserve. Unnecessary protection of oneself from difficulties, deprivation, or suffering is like a condom on the heart. It gives and receives only partially, holding back the fullness that underlies real love. The barrier of selfishness prevents divine life from being transmitted and growing in the marriage. Emotional and spiritual sterility in a marriage starts in the heart.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Jesus\u2019 love for his Bride is FAITHFUL<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p><em>I am with you always&#8230;<\/em> [<a href=\"http:\/\/www.usccb.org\/nab\/bible\/matthew\/matthew28.htm\">Matt 28:20<\/a>]\nBeing faithful is not just about sex. It means never exposing her to any undue hardships or sinful temptations and it means guarding her heart.\u00a0 It\u2019s respecting the spouse and putting her first. Many marriages are in disorder in that the kids, work, or even an overly attached friend or mother-in-law take priority while the spouse is expected to understand. Barring an emergency, or the genuine health and welfare of another, your wife\u2019s time, desires, and needs, should be your priority. The irony is that when she knows you will always put her first over others, she will freely (and quickly!) defer and offer up her place. But don\u2019t <em>take<\/em> it from her and expect her to feel loved.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Jesus\u2019 love for his Bride is FRUITFUL<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p><em>I came so that they might have life and have it more abundantly.<\/em>\u00a0[<a href=\"http:\/\/www.usccb.org\/nab\/bible\/john\/john10.htm\">John 10:10<\/a>]\nLove is open to, embraces, and nurtures life.\u00a0 It takes risks, does the work, and pays the price so that delicious fruit can come from the relationship. Love fills the other with all good things and rejoices in it\u2014 in every relationship but uniquely and most intimately in marriage. Fruitfulness reveals a complete openness to the other.\u00a0 Make time for her. Listen to her. Learn to overcome the tension you feel when she is weak and needy or rough and demanding.\u00a0 Get help understanding what is at the root of any of your resistance. No matter how many years you\u2019ve known her, get to know her more deeply. \u00a0Ripe, juicy fruit will be your reward!<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Women are wired to love in return<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Wives, if your husband would sincerely try to \u201clay his life down\u201d for you (as Christ did) in these four ways, wouldn\u2019t you happily \u201csubmit \u201c to that kind of love?\u00a0 Of course you would! And you would find the completion of that love and happiness by naturally opening up your mind and heart <em>freely, fully, faithfully, and fruitfully<\/em> to him. He needs that same fullness of love from you\u2014whether he first gives it or not.<\/p>\n<p>St. Paul tells us in Ephesians 5 that earthly marriage is a mysterious sign, an imperfect but real picture of the &#8220;spousal&#8221; relationship between God and every soul.\u00a0 We don\u2019t drag God down to our limited understanding and level; we lift our understanding of marriage to something divine.<\/p>\n<p>Will any husband get it right all the time? No!\u00a0 Will any wife? No, and we must be tender and patient with one another. Only God&#8217;s love can satisfy the deepest desire of the heart, but he wired us all to desire and share in that kind of love.<\/p>\n<\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":4,"featured_media":9647,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":true,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[72,66,71],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v22.4 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Short List to Loving Your Wife - Rose Sweet<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Follow these four ways to truly love your wife and you are guaranted to be a blessed and happy man. 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