{"id":10378,"date":"2022-07-17T02:02:31","date_gmt":"2022-07-17T02:02:31","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/thriveserver2.info\/rose\/?p=10378"},"modified":"2023-04-18T01:03:50","modified_gmt":"2023-04-18T01:03:50","slug":"meet-the-family","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/rosesweet.com\/meet-the-family\/","title":{"rendered":"Meet the family!"},"content":{"rendered":"

I love a good mystery!<\/h4>\n

When I was six, my little neighbor, Terry, called me over to look through the hole in our shared wooden fence. Then he stabbed me with a sharpened pencil, darn-near blinding me. After I got over the shock, hurt, anger, and fear, Mom sat me down and tried to explain why Terry may have done that. Like I cared.<\/p>\n

But Mom stimulated my curiosity and, ever since, I’ve been intrigued by what makes people tick. I love a good mystery!<\/p>\n

Years late in therapy I dug more deeply into the fence incident. I learned that, in response to trauma, a little “protector” part of me emerged. Like a little cartoon angel on my shoulder, she interiorly echoed Mom’s words: Be careful, not everyone is safe<\/em>. But another part of me did not want to give up on Terry. I didn’t want it to be true that some people were not safe, or that I could not play with them. That made me sad. So another little protector emerged to cheer up the little sad part: You don’t have to be sad! Maybe we can go over there and see if he is nice again.<\/em> Thus began a long and constant inner conflict where I would be hurt or used by others and, instead of reconciling to reality, I’d go back again (and again), hoping that maybe this<\/em> time I would be safe.<\/p>\n

We are marvelously mysterious!<\/h4>\n

We are complex and beautiful creatures and deserve to be seen, heard, understood, and accepted<\/em>. We can see the value of doing that for others, but to be fully human, we must begin by doing it for ourselves. As Socrates so wisely counseled, “Know thyself” is imperative in understanding the beauty, dignity, and purpose of who we are. Scripture also bids us to know our hearts, test ourselves, get the log out of our own eyes, and ultimately love ourselves<\/em> as we love our neighbor.<\/p>\n

But we’re usually too rushed tired, or afraid to take the time to go into our interior. Scary things may lurk there (they do, by the way.) The key is not to venture on our own but to enter with a trusted guide, using maps and tools designed for the journey. For me, Internal Family Systems (IFS) has proved to be one of many simple but effective aids for my own adventure into the interior.<\/p>\n

What is Internal Family Systems?<\/h4>\n

Some 25 years ago, IFS (Internal Family Systems) began to take root in the mental health field. IFS is not about your family of origin, but the community of parts that are within you<\/em>. You may have heard someone talk about the “committee inside your head,” or the “inner child within.” IFS fleshes this reality out by identifying and categorizing our parts.<\/p>\n